One of the most daunting aspects of deepening one’s self awareness is becoming aware of how you think. Paying attention to our thoughts can have a tremendous impact on our mental wellness and self esteem. That is why the goal of meditation and many spiritual practices is to create enough internal space so you can begin to witness your thoughts. When we can observe our thoughts, we create the possibility of preventing negative beliefs from being powerful influencers. But, confronting our self-talk of self-sabotage can be quite challenging.
It is difficult in itself to recognize how often we belittle ourselves and keep ourself “stuck”. Know that you’re not at fault for thinking this way; our mindsets are conditioned and have been programmed to trust the negative more than the positive, especially when the “facts” have been vetted. The mind will naturally disregard the newest information because “new” is not trusted. One way this can show up for many people is when receiving praise: compliments contrast pre-existing shadow beliefs.
The thing about our mind is that it believes it is being helpful by keeping us safe. The mind is clever and very solution-oriented. If we are not watchful, it will automatically fill in gaps of missing information with assumptions and made-up stories. Every time this happens we are rewarded with a dose of dopamine. We literally get high when we create a narrative - true or false. The mind strategically combines these techniques to prevent change because new and different can be very threatening. As a result negative thoughts will flow to make sure alterations do not happen. That’s why many people will settle for what is familiar, even if it is unhealthy.
In order to manifest and sustain conscious change in our lives, we have to work with our mind like we are training a puppy. Gentle encouragement that rewards the requested behavior. Step one: become aware of a negative thought or belief system. Like a puppy, we don’t yell or ridicule the thought or action, we simply notice and then encourage change, compassionately. Step two: once aware, we then intentionally replace the adverse thought or beliefs with new and positive ones. This becomes the practice until the shift within happens. Notice, acknowledge and implement change by distracting your mind. Just like bribing a puppy with a treat.
The distraction - the treat - are the positive thoughts that replaces the pessimistic ones. For each negative thought, the brain needs to hear a positive thought five times just to “neutralize” its mindset. Eventually, the repetition will shift the gloom towards the light. Repetition takes time but it has proven to be very powerful. Louise Hay (one of my superheroes) was renowned for demonstrating the power of affirmations to bring about self-healing and positive change. Hay suggested writing down an affirmation at least five times, for twenty one days. Affirmations shift your focus and help you cultivate positive energy. Affirmations are the original positive influencers!
At the end of my Soul Rejuvenation workshops, every attendee is invited to randomly select a Louise Hay affirmation card. They always seem to select one that resonates with them personally. In seeing this happen again and again, I believe every individual is capable of change and that we innately know what it is that we need and call it to ourselves. The biggest hurdle is always our mind and affirmations can be loving reminders that change is possible.
Throughout the process of reviewing and “revamping” it is important to be kind and patience with yourself; you’re unweaving a tightly woven way of believing, undoing one knot at a time. We each have had a lot of years getting really good at negative self talk so cultivating a new conversation will take time and lot of self love. I promise this road is well worth the journey, because on the other side is a greater capacity to love and the entire process is about living compassionately and beginning to experience your sense of self worth.
“Your mind is like a constant prayer.
Whatever it is focused on, will be.”
As my dear friend LB says, “Your mind is like a constant prayer. What ever it is focused on, will be.” I believe the practice of repetition is helpful for all of us. Whether you pray, meditate, chant, write or recite affirmations, the practice of positive repetition is extremely beneficial for our sense of well-being. Though the brain is a powerful thing to overcome, once we learn how to get past the hurdles of our mind, we can begin to see and feel how amazing we each really are. Our thoughts have a powerful impact on how we see and feel about ourselves and can shape our lives.
Soul Rejuvenation is a unique healing workshop that blends restorative yoga, channeling and hands on healing. Sound healing and essential oils are also integrated. This holistic workshop is intended to help heal and rejuvenate the mind, body and soul. Tania holds this event throughout the year in Santa Barbara. To learn more, visit www.taniaisaac.com/special-events